Contempt and contemplation

So if your were lucky enough to have been able to realize by the time you were 25 that there was a lot more to life than propagating the human race then I applaud you. However there are a number of us that were misinformed, and or stubborn enough to believe that we really knew what was going on in the world and that continuing our lives by continuing the species was the right thing to do at the time.

Some of us may have even had this insane belief that we had met the one human being of the opposite sex with whom we were supposed to spend the rest of our lives with.

On the other hand we may have just been naive sycophants looking for the next person in line to help us to believe we were special and had something to contribute to the world.

Now I am by no means one to sit here and label which group you belong to, or to say that you belong to either or some derivation there in. However, I do believe there are more or us that belong in these sub-classifications than we would like to admit.

Of course personality, past history, mental illness, perspective and desire all play a huge role not only in these classifications but in the one in which we would like to be a part, regardless of its title.

But at what point to we take a moment to realize that regardless our background we are in fact working toward a common goal?

I mean realistically regardless of your method we all want to survive, alcoholic, type A perfectionist, drug dealer, Wall street multi billionaire. We all just want to get to a point where we have food in our bellies and clothes on our backs and something other than a lightning storm to sleep under. Even those who can't figure out up from down still don't want to freeze to death in the winter or melt beyond recognition in the summer.

So here I am, taking a moment to appeal to all. I sometime find myself, the type A, trying to make it all perfect. Making sure my kids have the best possible house in the best possible neighborhood. Sometimes I can be the alcoholic, telling anyone and everyone to f**ck off and god only knows what else. Trying to drown what ever happens to be wrong with my life at that moment in the nectar of the demons in my soul.

I don't really  ever feel as though I have fallen into the drug dealer type; unless you want to equate Velveeta and hot dogs to child crack and figuring out how it is that I can ration said food groups over the week to feel as though my kids have eaten, but that I haven't totally failed in providing them with something nutritious. Nor have I ever felt as though I can pretend to be the Wall Street billionaire; though again my kids would love that, it would definitely mean someone who can cook better than I.

But regardless we have all been in a situation which we may feel could have better, we may feel could have been worse. The only thing that couldn't have changed in that moment was the people around you.

As such I get back to the title and beg you to contemplate before you hold contempt.

I think a great deal about the things people around me say. I may not react immediately, I promise you I never will, I am my father's daughter to that regard. But I don't pass firm judgement lightly.

For right this minute I may be mad that you spent more time talking on the phone than with your family. But then an hour later I remember that the kids make me crazy so why the fu** do I want to sit here and talk to them? On the flip side I don't sit on the other side of the yard, totally disconnected, and then ask why...

None of that, by thew way, gives you right to make me feel like a rat cornered in the garage because I happened to say something off the tip of my tongue. And as much as I may need to control myself under times of duress, so do you.

I want no contempt, I only want contemplation. So please, before you think to pass any judgement on myself or others, think about with you want to hold that person in contempt, or whether you think it would be worth while to contemplate.

One is a final decision of frustration and anger.

The other a moment of clarity and thought that can lead to a greater outcome.

Help to be part of the movement forward rather than the stagnant frustration that is present societal standard.

Maybe too much, maybe not enough, but my thoughts none the less.